Welcome at Flow of Miracles

Dear People,

Often we have troubles looking clearly at our own actions in the past. We can be overcome by shame, fear or guilt when we relive what we have done. We might get angry at the state of our lives or jealous at others. So we shy away from our truth and our past, missing important clues on how to make or now and our future better.

So today I've written a little bit about the healing power of self reflection and an exercise to try at home.

Self Reflection
As a tool, self reflection helps us by showing us what is working and isn't working in our lives. When we try something, we never know what kind of results we get, until the end. Then we have to live with the consequences. When we use self reflection, we are powerless to change what has happened, but we are empowered by hindsight and experience.

I like to reflect on how the main three things first: time, energy and attention. I like to see how I used my time during the day, week or month. That allows me to see what I'm doing with my life. Sometimes I might get mired in spending time on things that don't matter much to me (pointless reading, long phone calls etc.) instead of working towards my goals and enjoying my life.

I also check how my energy levels where. Seeing where they dip, allows me to see what isn't working or where I need more support. Or, just relax and deal with the fact that I got the flu or are a little below the weather. I check if my energy is with me or if I'm giving it to others, trying to help them in a self sacrificing or sabotaging way. Seeing where my energy grows and multiplies, tells me what I need to have more off in my life.

I also see what has held my attention; did I work towards my goals? Was I distracted with other things going on in my life? Did I got stuck in negativity or did I move towards problem solving? Was I able to trust or not? What holds our attention grows and we often spend time and energy on that which holds our attention.

Exercise
Make sure you have around 10-25 minutes in which you can work uninterrupted and have a pen and paper ready. If during this exercise you notice that you are creating judgements, fear, shame or guilt, take some time to release those.

Question 1: What went well this (week/month/year) ?
Sub-question: Why?

Question 2: What didn't go well ? What are you disgruntled/angry/dissatisfied about?
Sub-question: Why not? What would have been better to do?

Question 3: What plans/decisions are you going implement in the next (week/month/year) ?

Example:
What went well this week?
Eating healthier food.

Why?
It went well because I made sure I had some good snacks to take with me or easily grab. I made time to make some good juices to help pick me up. I planned healthier dinners and was energetic enough to fix them. I saw some good results on the scale and that motivated me to stay on course.

What didn't went well?
Fixing some administration. I still have to finish it.

Why not?
I'm bored, I don't like doing it and it's a lot of work. I preferred doing other things and distracted myself with other tasks. It would have been better to plan a time/date and sit my ass down to finish it.

What am I going to implement?
I need some extra motivation, so I'm going to reward myself when this administration is finished. I will plan a time/date that works so I can have 2 uninterrupted hours and fix it. I am going to continue with the healthy dinners.

Possible problems in judgements/fears/shame/guilt:

• I should have done it already => I can't go back in time
• I am lazy => I choose to finish this and increase my discipline and motivation
• I am dumb => I choose to find help so I can finish this
• Well, that went well, let's not think on it => I choose to learn from my experiences
• I am afraid I can't do this => Let's find out how far I come/Let's try

Want to use self reflection regularly to make better choices? Start journalling, start a bullet journal or use an App. Want help with self reflection in a healthy manner or share your journey? Post a comment on the blog, reach me through Facebook,  e-mail me or ask me in the practice.