When working with people, I often have to work with them to release the fear based perspective. Many people feel the world is dangerous, they have to work hard, nothing goes their way and they are constantly in fear of things getting worse. The global pandemic that started 2020 of course seems to be a validation that this mindset is correct. However, the more we stay in this perspective, the less we are able to find solutions, cope with our disappointments and build something better.
Purpose of fear
Fear is supposed to help us assess if something is dangerous, what the risk would be and to take a conscious decision to take that risk or not. Healthy fear can help us survive and make good choices. I am happy with that purpose of fear.
A fear based perspective however doesn't serve a healthy purpose. When we are fearful of everybody, that's living in a nightmare world. We know in our heart of hearts, that there are good people in the world. When we are always fearful of worse outcomes, we invest so much energy in worry, pain and disappointment instead of in trust, openness and bonding.
When people are in a fear based perspective, they tend to give up: "It won't work anyway", don't invest in others "everybody sucks", don't invest in themselves: "It's just a matter of time before I'm unlucky again" and generally live miserable lives.
It's natural to have to deal with fear, but wallowing in it isn't the answer.
Fear based perspective signs
Mentally, it's easy to see when we slip into fear based perspective: our mind isn't finding any good outcomes. There's a reorganization at work: we are sure we will get fired. The options of staying on or finding an even better job don't exist. Our partner is mad at us: we are sure they are going to leave us. The options of finding new understanding, solving an issue together or finding a compromise don't exist. If you hear yourself only specifying bad outcomes when you have an issue, it's clear that you are in a fear based perspective.
Another mental signal is excessive worry about things that never seem to happen. In a fear based perspective so many things can go wrong, but in the real world, good and neutral things happen all the time. If you find your worries often unfounded, it's clear that you have some fear based perspective bothering you.
Emotionally, people in fear based perspectives tend to be quite anxious. Since fear is ever present, it becomes impossible to relax. There is always something lurking in the background. Real enjoyment is also quite hard to feel or contentment, because a fear based perspective makes you feel that such a moment can only be fleeting.
Physically, you might notice a lot of muscle tensions, stress headaches and problems sleeping. The adrenaline of continuously dealing with fear can really do a number on our hormonal system and immune system.
Moving away from a fear based perspective
There are many ways of moving away from a fear based perspective, so I'm going to write a list with several things that you can practice:
- Gratitude - what's going right
- Choosing positivity
- Catching yourself when you move towards doom thinking/negavitity
- Kindness
- Finding the Helpers
- Healing family or life patterns of pain
- Healing family or life patterns of fear
- Writing affirmations
- Writing positive life stories
- Empowerment
- Solution based thinking
- Trust
- Meditations on Truth
There are many ways on moving away from fear and the more you do it, the more you can see the truth of the world: it's full of good people trying to do their best. The more you can see the truth of God: we are all his innocent children and he wants the absolute best for us.
Have a story to share about how you dealt with fear based perspective or want some support with this issue? Post a message on the blog or on the Facebook Fan Page or talk to me in the practice.
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